I started out on this journey as a simple fast, a break from something that seemed to consume too much of my time. It was originally given as a challenge from our pastor, to fast from something, whether it be chocolate(tried and failed miserably), fast food, Facebook, caffeine(didn't want anyone to die in this process), etc.
So, in my "big ideas" nature, I decided I would take it a step further, and try this process during Lent. . I personally had never observed the Lent season before.. I grew up in a church that never really even discussed Lent. To be honest, I never even really understood what it meant and why other denominations observe it, until I was a young adult. After some reading and research as to what this time meant, I decided this would be the perfect time to give up something that seemed to take up so much of my time.
I never dreamed the journey it would take me on....
I must admit, those first few days of withdraw from Facebook were a little harder than I thought they were going to be. I missed grabbing my phone and scrolling down through my feed, looking at friends pictures, and keeping up to date on prayer requests. But, as the first week passed, I started to realize that I felt free and a lot less stressed.
As I started thinking about all of this, I also started to question WHY I felt free? It's not like I was chained to Facebook, made to look at it when I didn't want to...
I think that the first thing I have learned in my fast from this popular social media sight, is that no matter how old people are, they always crave popularity and acceptance from others. They post pictures, check in's, and general posts as a way to see how many comments and likes they receive. And if that is you, it's ok. We all have these tendencies... It's just an observation and I too have been guilty of this.
I also learned that if left unchecked, it can easily become a comparison trap. It's easy to post the lovely pics of your children, your new home or new car, or how proud you are of your kiddo. But how often do we post the ugly, the messy, the junk that makes us normal?? I guess what I'm trying to say is that I found myself so often comparing myself to others. I started to think that I somehow didn't measure up, that I must not be as good a mom as they are, that I would never have the house out of "Better Home and Gardens", and that I would never be as fit as they are. I think we choose to post the pretty because we worry that people may judge us or find joy in our suffering....or if we post the ugly, it may show that we DONT have it all together and that WE TOO are in need of Gods unbelievable grace!
It took stepping away for me to gain perspective. My life is messy, it's ugly, and it's not at all perfect! But I am a daughter of Jesus Christ, who accepts me as I am. He fills my heart and my spirit. And to compare myself to others, minimizes his great love for me. His love that makes me unique and a work in progress. We all have different talents, gifts and abilities as workers, parents, friends, and neighbors. We all fail, we all have ugly moments, and we are all in need of our Savior and his grace and mercy!
I learned a few more things along this journey and am still processing it all... I will save it for another day. In the meantime, I don't think I will ever return to Facebook as a regular daily user. I will eventually reactivate my account and catch up with everyone, but I don't plan in keeping an app on my phone. I have enjoyed this time of soul searching and the peaceful quiet that has come along with it.
Grace. Peace. Joy
Lori